10 Years Later...

You knew I'd blog about it the first minute I had. I was waiting for the alcohol to leave my system and my brain to process everything.

It's been a long time since we've been together where alcohol was involved. I think because when there's that much, we lose control. And if there's one thing we both hate, it's losing control, especially around each other. I tried to play it cool last night, to steer clear of you, not bring up the past. I mean you're married now, you have a life that's completely separate from me. But it was you who started it, it was you who instigated it. You kissed me. And although you said it meant nothing, I think you're lying. You pulled that card when we were teenagers and yet here we are again. I think the Latin phrase is true, "in vino est veritas". "In wine there is truth." You've always been the most truthful and honest with me when you've had a few drinks. Not necessarily drunk but enough to loosen you up. You see for me, it's always been you but I somehow forgot that in a lot of ways, for you, it has always been me. I'm the one person who you knew would love you no matter what. I would always come to your rescue. I was willing to do anything, to be...anything, for you. I've tried to fight it and I've tried to ignore it but I can't. And what's worse is you know I can't, but you bait me anyways. It's funny because I should be mad at you but I'm not. You reacted exactly how I thought you would. And as nice as it was, I know you.

And you always were a coward...